My Letter for My Daughter as She Turns 18

Today, my daughter turns 18. 

I made this letter a year ago, and I posted this here in my blog on September 24, 2020 scheduling it to be posted on January 6, 2021.

Whether or not I'm still around today as she turns 18, I hope she gets to read this letter.

I love you, Katrina Alyssa! 

Dear Katrina,

Today, you turn 18 years old. You have reached a major pinnacle in your life, but it has only just begun. I eagerly wait with anticipation to see what your life has in store for you. Of all the things I am capable of giving you today, I feel my words are the most valuable.

These are exciting times for you.

Finishing high school, going to college, starting a career, moving out on your own..? Paying your own bills, dating, marriage, having kids. The possibilities are endless. But, I’m not going to lie. A lot of times, life is going to get rough. That's for sure.

However, it’s all in how you handle the stress of life that determines whether or not you will succeed. Having a negative attitude towards the stress and being pessimistic will not, I promise you, resolve anything. Taking deep breaths, keeping an optimistic attitude and developing a character that doesn’t quit will take you much further in life than anyone tells you.

I can still remember 18 years ago, on the day that you were born. You were a very beautiful baby who looked like a troll doll. From that moment on, my life evolved around you. There was nothing I wouldn’t do to keep you safe.

When I look at you, I see my own eyes looking back at me. They are thoughtful, ambitious, spontaneous and quick to find the good in others. I can only hope you learn to find the good in yourself. 

People will disappoint you. It’s in our nature. It’s the ones who disappoint you, own up to it, apologize and never do it again that are worth keeping around. At the same time, be careful with whom you choose to associate and don’t be so naïve to believe that you can trust just anyone. 

Make others prove their worthiness to be trusted as anyone of sound mind will ask of you.

Be someone people can rely on, but don’t allow yourself to be taken advantage of either. Stand up for yourself and for those who cannot stand up for themselves.

Love yourself and don’t allow anyone to make you feel less of a person through their words or actions. You, and you alone, are in control of your emotions and well-being. By allowing someone else to taint your self-worth, you give them power over you.

Choose your battles. Life is too short to be arguing with someone all the time about everything. This goes for friends and family as well as any future romantic relationships.

Be empathetic and put yourself in the other person’s shoes, and try to see things from their perspective. 

A smile at the right time will always go a long way.

When you find the love of your life and eventually get married, …
I’ll skip that part and reserve it for your wedding day..
40 years and 2 days from now.

Speaking of love, don't settle. Marry that special person, and he should make you laugh. Whatever you do, don’t allow him to place you on a pedestal to be worshipped, because when valuables fall, they break. Make sure he sees you as an equal and is willing to walk beside you and not force you to walk behind him nor in front of him. 

If it feels wrong, don’t do it. If you know it’s wrong, don’t go along with it.

Don’t be in such a hurry to grow up. Yes, you’re now officially an adult, but that definition goes far beyond just being a number. Being an adult means being responsible with all aspects of your life. There is plenty of time to move out and live on your own. Other than your current job after school, your only other job for the next few years should be discovering who you are as a person, going to school, and learning from the mistakes of the adults around you - your mama and I included. There are many of us who came before you that have made plenty of mistakes. Don’t make the same ones just because you want to be treated as an adult.

Think long-term and not short-term. The mistakes you make now can haunt you forever. You don’t want to live with that kind of guilt.

Ask for advice. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Asking for help is NOT a sign of weakness… instead, it is a sign of maturity that shows you know the depth of your limitations.

If someone gives you constructive criticism, don’t assume they’re being critical. Take it for what it is and smile. It may be the best advice you ever receive.

Above all else, remember that you are loved.

Though having birthday parties has never been a thing in our family, we are celebrating today because today is a huge milestone in your life. You may not have a big extended family to celebrate with you, but you can be assured that right now, you are surrounded by people who would each give their own lives to protect you and keep you safe. None of us want to see you fall, fail or get hurt. Your family is forever with you. 

Follow your dreams. Never give up on something you desperately want. Ever.
Don’t make the same mistakes I’ve made in my life.
You are my first-born. You are my only daughter.

You are my love and all things good in my heart. When you hurt, I hurt. When you have joy, I have joy.

Happy birthday,  baby.
Your mama and I.
We love you forever.

CTC Turns 15 Years Old

The little theatre family that my soul sister, Gayle, and I started a long time ago just turned 15 years old. Yes, it seems like yesterday when we were at the lobby of Marriott Hotel talking about it, then the talks became plans, and the plans slowly became a reality.

For the past few years, we've celebrated our anniversary with Mini-Concerts-for-a-Cause.

This year, God-willing, we will celebrate it by mounting an original play (based on the life of Joseph in the Bible's Old Testament). Crossing my fingers that this will become a reality soonest.

And let me also share this weird feeling that because this is my passion project, something I've worked hard on the past 5 years, I have a feeling that I'm going to die after this production is staged. Yes, I shouldn't think of those morbid things, but I've always had that feeling especially that there were/are a lot of reasons why this production was/is delayed.

Oh well.

Day 1 - Your Birthday Wish

I wish that my daughter will grow up to be 

a good citizen of humanity. 

Day 2 - A Pic of Yourself before You turn 35

Day 3 - Two Words you've always wanted to say to your Younger Self

Day 4 - Provide pictures of 5 Celebrity Crushes

I can't think of 5 since I've only had 2 all-time Celebrity Crushes. :)

Day 5 - Post a Screenshot of Your Desktop

Day 6 - Your views on Drugs and Alcohol

Ever since I was young, I've always had 4 things that I will never ever do in my life.

I will never take drugs.

I will never drink alcohol.

I will never smoke.

I will never wear contact lens.

I'm turning 35 in a few days, and nothing has changed.

Day 7 - Something You're Currently Worried About

I am currently worried about not being able to find a job before Christmas.

Last October 21, my boss informed me that the CEO wants to end my contract and is not interested in regularizing me.

It is very painful especially that I've sacrificed a lot for this job.

My last day of work will be on November 20, that's a week after my birthday.

Bittersweet.

I don't want to treat anyone on my birthday only because I will have to save as much money as I can since I don't have a new job that I will be starting anytime soon.

I am worried about not finding a job soon, because the world will not stop when I'm already jobless.

Day 8 - Your Fears

I have been through Hell and back in my life, that I don't scare easily anymore.

Having said that, my fears are all about my daughter.

I am afraid that my daughter will grow up not following what I've been teaching her.

I am afraid that my daughter will be taken away from me before I will be taken away from her.

I am afraid that I will not be able to protect my daughter anymore.

I am afraid that I will fail my daughter.

I am afraid that I will no longer be the hero in my daughter's eyes.

Day 9 - A Quote You Try to Live By

Day 10 - Put your iPod on shuffle and List the First Ten Songs

I haven't updated my playlist for a long time, but then again, I am not updated with the latest songs so.. yeah.


1. All of Me - Boyce Avenue

2. Defying Gravity - Idina Menzel

3. In Your Eyes - Rachelle Ann Go

4. Seasons of Love - Instrumental

5. The Lord is My Strength - Michael Lapid, SDB

6. The Way You Look Tonight - Martin Nievera

7. Basang Basa sa Ulan - Aegis

8. Music from Above - Kindred Hearts Cast

9. Bridge Over Troubled Waters - Simon and Garfunkel

10. With a Smile - Eraserheads


There you go.

A mix of everything.

Day 11 - Something That You Miss

I miss musical theatre.

It has been a while since I've been involved in a full musical, and I so miss it.

Theatre has been my life for 22 years, so it has become almost second nature to me.

I miss directing.

I miss acting.

I miss singing.

I miss doing all three at the same time.

*sigh*

Day 12 - Twelve RANDOM Facts About Yourself

I changed the word "Interesting" to "RANDOM" just because..

Anyway..

1. I love theatre.

2. 2015 is my 22nd year in theatre.

3. My greatest influence in singing is Martin Nievera.

4. My greatest influence in musical theatre is Colm Wilkinson.

5. I used to be a dancer before I became a singer.

6. I am very transparent.

7. I am 50-50 with singing contests. I only joined twice.

8. It's easier for me to perform in front of a thousand people, than to talk in front of 10 or less.

9. I am a loner.

10. I have a 12-year old daughter who is my everything.

11. My dream role is The Beast in Beauty and the Beast the Musical.

12. I have very low self-esteem.

Back Again

My last post was two years, six months and two days ago.

So many things have happened.

I don't know until when I'll be writing here again, but hey, I'm back.

For now.

This was not planned, but staring at my monitor at the office, sick and tired, made me think of doing a sort of countdown or challenge, this time for my birthday.

Everyone who knows me knows that I'm not really big with my birthday.

I still am not.

But so many things have happened.

So many unexpected deaths.

Young, healthy people.

So much younger and healthier than me.

Realizations once again that you don't really know when your time is up in this world, so I have decided to make my birthday a little special starting this year.

*cue in drum roll*

Since today is October 31, I have 12 days to go before my birthday, so I will be doing the 12 Day Challenge: Countdown to my 35th Birthday. Haha :D

I'm 32

Today would have been another ordinary day for me, but there were a few people who made sure this would be anything but ordinary for me. Yes, I turned 32 years old today.

My tita, who's like my second mother as she's the biological mom of my soul siblings, treated us to a super yummy early dinner at Dessert Factory. It was only my second time to eat there. The first time was with the Bisdaks a long time ago. After dinner, tita gave me a super beautiful Red Ribbon birthday cake from my soul siblings. Those alone already made my birthday special.

When we got home, a big box was waiting for me. Mom said it was delivered by 2 guys riding a motorcycle, and they said they didn't know who sent the box. It was a custom made box with custom designs that included my picture as Jean Valjean, a picture of Victor Hugo, and a lot of quotes and lyrics. Inside were a lot of things: a coffee mug, a smiley stress ball, a diary, an inspirational booklet, a desk clock, a keychain, a pen, a red cloth, and a copy of 'Footprints in the Sand'.

I went to the office with a smile on my face, and a smile in my heart. I never expected people to really remember my birthday, much more exert effort to make it memorable. I feel loved today. So loved.

Happy birthday to me.

Thank you, Lord, for another year.

Happy 9th Birthday, Katrina Alyssa!

It's not only children who grow. Parents do too.

As much as we watch to see what our children do with their lives,

they are watching us to see what we do with ours.

I can't tell my daughter to reach for the sun.

All I can do is reach for it, myself..

Happy 9th birthday, my dearest daughter ♥

I love you always and forever ♥

As I start my 31st year..

What can one say to a dream come true?

What can one say to have sung for you?

All these years have been a blessing to me,

all of you included, not to mention my family.

And to the people whose faith took me to higher places,

too many names, but I will always remember the faces.

You are all in my heart, in my soul you belong

Wherever God puts me, you're in every song.

Chasing time is what I'm all about

"Time, don't chase me" is my prayer, my shout.

I thank you all for the 30 awesome years

Songs, smiles, laughters and tears.

I will make a promise for you all today

I will sing for you forever, can't stop me, no way.

I'm chasing time! Catch me if you can..

Will I make it or not? It's all up to the MAN! 

Katrina Turns 8

It was her simplest birthday, but perhaps one of the happiest. We woke her up so early this morning with a birthday cake, a candle, a single balloon and birthday music. Her face brightened up right away when she saw our small surprise, and her genuine appreciation and happiness stayed with her until she slept tonight.

We may not have everything, and we certainly cannot afford everything, but we thank the Lord everyday for blessing us with what we need, and for blessing us with a daughter like Katrina. I am not the best father there is, but I'm trying my darn best to be at least a good father to her. I'm just thankful that I have a daughter as good as her.

Happy Birthday, Kit! I hope and pray that you'll continue to be as good as you are even if Papa will no longer be around. Never forget that come what may, I love you very much!

Erika Grace Turns 21

Today, my Shobe turned 21. I suck at organizing surprises so I wasn't able to organize anything for her, unlike my birthday where it was her who organized that simple but very meaningful and touching surprise. For her birthday this year, I just made a simple video compilation. Yes, this is simple but it's from the heart. And since we no longer have rehearsals, it was not easy to go around and get the people to record their greetings.

Happy, happy Birthday Erika Grace!

Thank you for EVERYTHING!

I love you, my dear sister!